No wonder rapists and stalkers get the wrong idea...

I was recently emailed one of those pesky chain emails that tell you that if you don't forward it on to ten or more friends then you will not date anyone for 5 years and your nose will fall off - you know the type...and I started to read through the usual codswallop that ensues.

Then it dawned on me, no wonder stalkers get the wrong idea about women loving them dearly when they really couldn't give a damn. Read this: (brilliant spelling and grammar by the way)

if u repost this in 5 min the person that is longing to b with u will approach u within 1 month and ask u out or grab you and kiss u. but if u break this chain no 1 will like u or ask u out again for 5 years........advice....

WHEN SHE ACTS SHY -SAY I LOVE YOU
WHEN SHE RUNS AWAY FROM YOU- CHASE HER
WHEN SHE PUTS HER FACE NEAR YOURS- KISS HER
WHEN SHE KICKS & PUNCHES- HOLD HER TIGHT
WHEN SHE IS SILENT- SHE'S THINKIN OF HOW TO SAY I LOVE YOU
WHEN SHE IGNORES YOU- SHE WANTS ALL YOUR ATTENTION
WHEN SHE SAYS YOU ARE CRAZY-SHE IS REALLY CRAZY ABOUT YOU
WHEN SHE PULLS AWAY- GRAB HER BY THE WAIST AND NEVER LET GO
WHEN YOU SEE HER AT HER WORST- TELL HER SHE'S BEAUTIFUL!*
WHEN SHE SCREAMS AT YOU- TELL HER YOU LOVE HER BUT MEAN IT
WHEN YOU SEE HER WALKING-SNEAK UP BEHIND HER GRAB HER BY THE WAIST AND GIVE HER A KISS
WHEN SHE'S SCARED!!!!!!!!!-HOLD HER AND TELL HER EVERYTHING WILL BE OK CAUSE SHE'S WITH YOU
WHEN SHE LOOKS LIKE SOMETHINGS THE MATTER- KISS HER AND TELL HER NOT TO WORRY
WHILE SHE HOLDS YOUR HANDS- PLAY WITH HER FINGERS

Now read the ones that are bold again - particularly the one about when she kicks and punches - hold her tight...no wonder why we have rapists and stalkers. Curse you and your horrid chain emails!